Yoga Retreat

Last week I went to Kripalu for an R&R Yoga Retreat with Mallory. In addition to delicious organic vegetarian meals and plenty of yoga, we had a choice of several workshops each day and some of them felt like being in the best part of grad school again: drum circles, collage, medicine and movement... Good times.

One of the workshops we went to was called "Realize Your Dreams" (I think). First we were asked if we could do one thing and were guaranteed we would not fail, what would it be and we announced it to the room full of fellow traveler strangers on R&R retreats, which was super uncomfortable for me, but has gotten me thinking more about what I told everyone. Then we were given a handout with a list of categories for a dream journal and asked to think of goals for each area. The list is as follows:

physical

emotional

spiritual

material

creative

legacy

professional

intellectual

psychological

financial

adventure

character

A part of me was really excited about the idea and the other part of me was like, "Stop it! How many goals and projects can you juggle? You got enough going on already," but I just can't say no and couldn't stop thinking what I would do with dreams in a journal. I can even rationalize, because I have goals in most of this areas already. It's just organization and format really. Right? So after a couple of days of thinking about it and telling myself no and trying to thought block ideas for taking on another project, told myself yes and went to Michael's and bought a Smash Book to act as my dream journal/scrap book.

It has always surprised me that I am not a scrapbook person, because I love taking photos and I love working with paper. For the first page, I glued down an envelop and I am making simple cards with collage images and goals. I will work on each of the pages with details regarding each of the goals. This is what I have so far.

I am pretty stoked about it. And... I am still keeping up on my daily calendar modifications, so so far so good. This is a fun idea and it has created a sense of positivity and feeling like all I reach for is possible. Maybe so possible, I might someday tell you what I said I would do if I could not fail.

 

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Meditation and Giving

First, a quote from the book I finished today. I add it because it made me think of art therapy and the psychological need to collect new images sometimes.

“The longer we live, the more images we collect, both positive and negative. These images are not always at the front of our mind; they fall to the background of our mind. But when we have a buildup of images, especially of negative ones, they come to mind more and more as bothersome thoughts, wreaking havoc on our sleep and our relationships. Since the mind is neutral and adapts to its environment, we become accustomed to this experience, like becoming accustomed to dirt and clutter in an unkempt house. A rundown and irritated feeling becomes the norm, and after a while, we can’t imagine feeling a different way”

Excerpt From: Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche. “Running with the Mind of Meditation.” Harmony Books, 2012-04-10. iBooks.
This material may be protected by copyright.

Check out this book on the iBookstore: https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/running-mind-meditation/id468744177?mt=11

Second, a shout out to my iPad for making that quote happen so easily with automatic credit where credit is due.

Third, back to my blog.

I have been doing a lot of reading, catching up on all the writing and reports I have to do at work, planning and preparing more for my yoga classes and thinking more about meditation practice. I am still struggling with my meditation goal most of all even though it is the simplest of commitments. That is why my own work this week is related. I would like to create a meditation space in our apartment. Today we cleaned out a corner and I am working on finishing a quilted mediation pillow I started a long time ago. It is made out of some of my old clothing.

I hope that the easier I make it to sit down and be with my mind, the more likely I will succeed.

In the interest of being a better, or rather better-liked, yoga teacher, I spent part of today making gifts for my students. I hope to have enough eye bags for my first classes of the year to give to everyone who attends classes the first week in January. Since this is when I am most likely to get the most new students, I want them to have happy yoga feelings and want to come back. These are just filled with a little rice and I got the fabric on clearance. Cheapest gifts ever! These are the bags.

This has been a productive week at work because the guys I work with are not at the school where my office is and do not have any groups. It has allowed me to reorganize myself, catch up on writing and plan for new groups and work I want to do with them. I am actually starting to get excited to get back to business as usual. I plan to incorporate some of the work I am dong for myself through trying to take time being with my thoughts for things to do with them and helping them feel calmer in their own bodies. More on that as it happens.

Happy new year!

Crocheting and Store

You know what would be the coolest?

If everything we did could earn money.

I think about this sometimes as I am doing a morning run, making some art, taking a bath...  Why won't someone pay me to mow my lawn and brush my teeth? These are the things poor people think when student loans are high and the chosen profession is notoriously shit pay. At least it is what I think. I have been teaching yoga 4 days per week, which is awesome, because it feeds right into that fantasy. I should do yoga anyway, so why not talk through my practice and get paid?  Plus, it's true that we really know a subject through teaching it. Now if I could just supplement my income through riding my bike and going on my morning run.

Artwise, I taught Mallory to crochet and we have been crocheting felted yoga bags.

My yoga bag in progress

 This thing takes forever! So, in the meantime, I also made Mallory some lobster amigurumis.  Get the free pattern here. 

There's something about mindless repetition of stitches that is soothing to me and when I am stressed or undergoing life changes as I have been recently, it's a sure way to manufacture calm.  I have a couple of kids I would like to introduce to crochet.

In an artistic attempt to pay off my massive student loan, I also reopened my etsy shop: Punky Monks, where I am selling my sock monkeys very cheaply right now in order to strum up some business and get rid of my stock.  I still have more finished items to add over the weekend and will likely add some photography soon as well with other items to follow.  My etsy store includes a twitter account and a blog. Right now I am hosting a free monkey give away to subscribers: go here for details.  Not a lot of success in sales so far, but I feel good about it. There is something about feeling kicked down that makes one find solutions.  I'm not starving by any means, but my new debt makes me creative in the methods I will take to get rid of it. I have claimed Sallie Mae as Enemy Number One and am determined to wipe that bill away. These are my current rookie problems.

Sock Monkeys for Sale!

Group Intervention and Other News

Successful intervention of the week is Play Doh Charades. Once a week I try to give my guys a group that is just about self regulation and integrates some sensory work. Last week's sensory group was a success. I brought a small Tibetan Singing Bowl from home and had the guys start by listening to me ring it 3 times and pay attention to the point they noticed the sound vibration stop. This "mediation" technique was a success. The guys were mellow, but alert, which is my favorite of their states. They were very interested in the bowl, so I allowed them to pass it around and have each person ring it once. To my surprise, they were appropriate with my bowl and passing it to their peers. They had lots of questions about it and I was impressed by their attention and interest in the new object.

Next I passed out small containers of Play Doh and had written random nouns on index cards which they took one at a time. I asked them to shape the clay into what was written on the card and the other guys had to guess. No prizes were offered, but they loved it. The only problem was they got a little too happy. Some of my guys are easily dysregulated and potentially dangerous and at one point one of them screamed with excitement and brought staff running, thinking something was wrong. It was good to see them all taking turns, enjoying group and feeling happy though. I had them settle down with some ending yoga postures and they all left feeling positive and saying they liked group, which makes me feel good.

And last weekend I finished my table.

Paper Mosaic Table

I am between projects now. I want to mosaic my dresser next, but feel a little overwhelmed with the thought of it. I may just revive my etsy site and make a few monkeys for a while between furniture projects.

I have been dealing with one of the stresses of being a rookie, which is cash. My student loans have started coming in and therapists really don't get paid so well when the cost of being one is factored in. It's freaking me out. So I have been exploring money-making options. I have a few ideas in mind to supplement my income, but I have one thing I can check off my list: I will be teaching yoga again. So far I have been offered one night a week, but my schedule may be rounding out over the next couple weeks as I am going into a large gym chain desperate for teachers and different locations are currently working on their spring schedules.

Lastly, my girlfriend and I have started a new blog about all of our adventures with some very cool stuff planned for this summer. If there is no chance you are a client past or present and would like to see it, email me or comment and I will send you a link.

Rapping with Teens

This past week was rather casual around my workplace, because my guys were on "vacation." Since I work for a residential treatment program, that means they were at the residence, rather than the school where I have an office. Although I went to the residence as usual during the week, I gave my guys the freedom to meet with me or not, work on something or not and since there was no school, we didn't have any groups. 

When I arrived one day, one of my guys had created a positive rap about himself and the program to share with me. Since we have started working on a video for groups, I gave my guys the option of filming something during their vacation and I encouraged this boy to use his rap as his video to share with the group. The guys I work with have "developmental delays."  This translates into several difficulties, including being a few years behind grade level. Reading and writing is often a big struggle for many of my guys. Writing a rap is an advanced skill with my kids; reading, memorizing, presenting it could be even more tricky. So, here's what we did: we went over each line and I had him practice and repeat, choose an appropriate space, camera angle and movement and we filmed it one line at a time, so he sounded his best with each line. I think we created something he can be proud of. Plus, it is a positive reminder to stay on track in his own words.

Coincidentally, one of my other guys wanted to write a rap with me. He rapped and I wrote. He was so proud of his work and showed all of the staff his rap collection. I photocopied his work and I am thinking about helping him make something with his rap hits like a book or c.d. Any creative ideas for translating written word to another art form?

As for my own goals and self-care. My book of the week is Art and Yoga by Hari Kirin Kaur Khalsa and I have been doing a simple DVD practice at home from Deepak Chopra's The Seven Spiritual Laws of Yoga along with listening to the lecture. Both are highly recommended. Here is some fast art in response to my practice.

Chakras, watercolor

 

Silence, watercolor

Adolescent Group: Failure and Success of the Week

The way groups at my new place of employment work are like this: we have a curriculum that lasts two weeks which covers a single concept. We have groups completely written out for us, but nobody uses them, because we are allowed to wander away from recommendations as long as the kids somehow know how to define the concept at the end of two weeks. At first, I thought two weeks (four groups) for each kid was way too much time to cover a single idea, but I am seeing that my guys do better with repetition, so I am learning to slow down with them.

This past week we started "red flag warning signs." The goal is that the guys will know internal versus external warning signs that precede acting out behavior. I wrote up activities to cover the topic, such as artistic representation of internal warming signs, making comic books of external warning signs, dramatic reenactment and a new version of red light green light. We started with a discussion and artistic representation of internal warning signs... epic failure. I don't know if this is true, but whenever we touch on bodily sensations, my guys claim to have none and give me the blank stare. This could be teens being teens or an honest part of the problem. Bottom line, this was a NO GO. The red light green light was a success with my older guys and okay with the younger group. We took turns naming an internal or external warning sign or neutral experience, not moving if it's a warning or trigger and taking a step forward if it's no problem. Example: "I ride my bike"... everyone who is not triggered by bike-riding steps forward. "Staff yells at me"... nobody moves.

I realized when the guys used my first artistic representation to do something else, look confused and/or refuse all together that I needed to go back and re-plan the rest of my red flag groups. I remembered rule number one about working with teens and realized the problem may have been that I broke it: never ask a teen about himself, especially in a group. Ask about someone else and they'll tell you all you need to know. So, for our next group, we made red flags, gluing red triangles onto sticks and decorating however kids liked (and some of them decorated with actual internal/external triggers, so they did get something from the first group). Then we watched the beginning of Hulk (and will continue to watch for the next week) and held up flags when guys noticed Hulk getting triggered.

I've used The Hulk in therapy before, but this movie is especially great for red flag warnings because he wears a pulse monitor and uses relaxation techniques when he notices his pulse increasing, so the guys can notice internal and external signs in someone else. Most of my guys loved this and did a stellar job noticing and explaining Hulk's warning signs. Also, we talked about why the Hulk doesn't want to lose control (people can get hurt) and there is a great line from Hulk's coach while he is teaching him pranayama, "When we control our body, we control our mind." I think this movie could lead the guys into being more open to learning relaxation techniques beyond deep breathing. Yoga was first developed as a sitting practice for men meant to help one develop super powers and immortality. The guys have a modified yoga practice, but I think if they see Hulk sorta doing it and learn about the history, they might buy into it a little more.

Yoga & Art & Psychology

Welcome to my fantasy world. In this world, I get to do all my favorite things at once. And since this is my fantasy world, let's also imagine I am wearing roller skates, blue dreadlocks and eating vanilla custard in a waffle cone with rainbow sprinkles... in the summertime... beside a swimming pool... while listening to the Beastie Boys... among good friends.

My work philosophy, if I haven't said so already, is that I don't want to do anything for money that I won't do for free, which is why art therapy is so fantastic for me. But know what would make it even more fantastic? If there was some yoga thrown in for good measure (and maybe roller skates, but I'll try to keep it real for the remainder of this post). If I could do yoga, art and psychological thinking all at once, that would be an ideal fantasy world moment. I know people actually mix these three, but I'm still trying to figure it out for myself in a way that I feel good about in the real world.

This past Saturday I went to a Journey Dance class at my favorite yoga studio. It was a very exciting class and I left feeling all warm and healthy and full of wonder about how to visually express the intention I had in my head during class. Journey Dance isn't really yoga, at least in a traditional sense, but the mental gymnastics of non-judgment, self-acceptance and intention exploration might be similar, so for today's purposes, I'm putting them together. Anyway, I made this.

Let Go, January 2010, mixed media

"Let go," was the mantra I repeated to myself when I started to worry that I was looking like a dork. I don't know if making art based on an intention discovered during a yoga class would make a good directive or not, but it worked for me.

I have seen people do things like draw their chakras, but I'm not so sure about the accessibility of chakras for the average American. Art to yoga or yoga to art with a therapeutic purpose is something I intend to continue exploring though.

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If this also interests you, I recommend a book I got not too long ago: Meditation and Yoga in Psychotherapy by Annellen M. and C. Alexander Simpkins. I just started reading it and thus far it is practical and provides believable research and evidence.

Also, I would love to go to an art & yoga workshop and maybe Aquarian Teacher Training if I had the extra time and cash. I cannot speak to its awesomeness, but it looks like there could be some good art and yoga combinations to come out of such training.